Well rounded moms know kids need to read during the summer to engage their brains, imaginations and their love of learning. In our house we make reading a treat, for example the older kids can stay up as late as they want as long as they are reading. We often head to the library and come home with arms full of anything that looks interesting, then we keep the books out in the family room so that they are easily accessible. I love when I wake up in the morning and find my kids already reading or when one of my children surprises me at 10:30 at night, when I find them still up and reading. At night I like to read to my girls out loud, no matter how old you get having a story read to you is always fun, plus we build memories as we all try and guess the plot or decided whether to read another chapter or go to bed. To help keep their excitement up I read the stuff they are reading so we can chat about it! They all seem to like the intellectual chatter and one on one attention!
Some of the books we have read this summer:
The Goose Girl- mom to megan and alli
Amelia's Middle School Survival guide-megan
Where I live-alli
The Hunger Games-chris
A collection of Wayside School books-chris
Models Don't Eat Chocolate Cookies-mom to megan
It's Raining Cupcakes-alli
Percy Jackson series-mom and dad
Kira Kira-megan
Bob books- joe about a million times
Hope you are all enjoying your summer, What are you reading?
Wednesday, August 4, 2010
Monday, May 17, 2010
Living with ADHD!
My oldest son was born on a cold October day. He was the most lovable blond haired baby I had ever seen. We immediately bonded. As the days passed on he wouldn't sleep with out me. I was nursing, so we kept him in bed with us. At night he would turn to nestle his head in my side simultaneously pushing my husband off the bed with his feet. It took six months to move him into the crib. Then one night he found his thumb and finally he was happy to be alone.
From the very beginning he had a lot to say, he made noises constantly. When we put him down on the changing table, he would talk to the air above him as if angels were swirling around him. One night when he was 6 months old I woke up to him crying. When I went to get him from the crib he took my face with both hands and started to jibber jabber as if to say, "I've been crying where have you been?" He would go on to be an early talker, once he started he didn't stop. It was nice to have someone to talk to all day and we talked about everything. I thought he was the smartest baby. I couldn't wait to send him to school.
His toddler years went by pretty uneventfully. Except he had an insatiable desire to do whatever I told him not to. For example...... put his hand on the hot stove, stick things in the electric sockets and touch a cactus. I couldn't take my eyes off him for a second. The only thing that was unusual was when he fell asleep in the car at night if he woke up when we got him home he would be somewhere half way between sleep and awake. When this happened he would just start crying and wouldn't stop. It was terrible because we couldn't put him to sleep or wake him up. We would have to walk around holding and rocking him until he would calm down.
When he was four we signed him up for preschool. He loved going to school each day. His teacher said he was a little silly but that it was manageable. In October he had his birthday. A boy from his class couldn't come. When we would see him each time my son would ask him why he didn't come. The boy was quiet and shy so he never responded. Though I explained it to my son over and over that they were busy that day. He just couldn't understand it. So each time we would see the boy he would ask again. Finally we had to forbid him to ask. The rest of the year went by uneventfully.
At the end of summer we prepared him for kindergarten. About two weeks before school started our school got a giant grant and used it to switch to full day kindergarten. The teachers were taken by surprise and only had two weeks to prepare for the change. They went from having two classes of 18 for 2 1/2 hours each to one class of 22 for 6 hours. It was a big adjustment for everyone. On the first day I got a note. He ran back to the gym equipment after recesses was over. The second day I got a note He was having trouble sitting still all day and he keeps asking for a drink of water. At home we would talk about the notes. Why did you get out of line at recess? "Well the other kids were all on this swing and I really just wanted to try it! It was empty so I ran over to it!" Why are you asking for water all the time? "Well they have a water bubbler in class and the teacher says we can only get a drink when she says we can. If the water bubbler is right there why do we have to ask to get a drink?" These notes came home every other day. My favorite was when He told the gym teacher that someone had already had a turn and the gym teacher responded that he didn't remember, My child responded,"That's okay, you're old, sometimes old people forget things!"
Every week it seem to be something new that the teacher was unhappy about. I was beginning to have a complex. My son spent more time in time out, then out and I was pleading with him each day to just behave and be quiet. The guidance counselor at the beginning of the year said that school could be a hard transition for some and that she was there for the parents also. I decided I would make an appointment. We met a few days later, I brought with me the stack of notes from the teacher. I had at least 30 and it was only December. We talked about all of my concerns and the counsellor decided she would go observe my sons class. In her observation she noted he was a little silly and that he found things a bit funnier then the rest of the class. He also had trouble not shouting out answers. She said it was normal behavior for his age and she would help the teacher with strategies in class. That week I realized my son had picked up reading. In all the hoopla that had surrounded the notes I hadn't noticed he was able to sound out most of the words in our Dr. Seuss books. I brought it up in our conference, Is it normal for children to go from hardly knowing the alphabet to sounding out words in three months? When they realized how quickly he was learning they teamed him with another bright student and the notes decreased substantially.
That summer we moved. First grade was a complete repeat of kindergarten. My son spent more recesses in then out. He had a desk separated from all of the other children and his teacher called every other day. So much so that I began to dread the telephone ringing. If the phone rang today at noon I would still be nervous. I can't speak that teachers name even now. I thought of homeschooling of switching his class. No one else seemed to see what I was seeing. He was bored, he couldn't stop talking and that he would do anything to stop if he could. His report card was all advanced accept for the social skills portion which he failed. The teacher thought he was just misbehaving. His behavior was hard to understand as my husband and I never got in trouble in school. We didn't know what to do. We spent all of our time and energy trying to make him like the other kids. It was like telling a kid who needs glasses that if he tries harder he will be able to see. We made it to the end of the year but our whole family was traumatized.
Second grade was better. The teacher was young and she had better skills to deal with the challenge my son posed to the classroom. He continued to be ahead in all his studies. In conference the teacher would say He can't sit still and he doesn't listen yet he gets A's on every test. We had a reward system going and pretty much we were paying him to sit still. Sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't. This is when I started looking into the causes of my sons behavior. Something wasn't right and no one would listen to me. He was acing all his subjects except the social skills. Talking out, sitting in his seat, staying on task and always speaking when he shouldn't. It was effecting the way he made friends and his self esteem. He was yelled at constantly and the kids were catching on. Sometimes they would say He had done something when he wasn't even there. When I said ADHD, everyone said NO! including my husband. Summer finally came and we all relaxed.
We entered third grade with new hope as he was older and more mature. Yet by October the teacher was sending notes again. She expected more from a third grader. At this point I couldn't take it anymore, I had a second grader, a kindergartner and and a two year old at home. He was different then all of them. When I looked in his eyes I could see his mind racing. He wanted so badly to fit in but he had no control. It took four months to convince my husband to get him tested. On a sunny day that spring we met with a nuerophycologist in Boston. She did one round of testing and then a week later she did a second round of tests. She thought that he was bright and very interesting. About a month later my husband and I returned to get the results. I remember sitting in the office listening to the Dr. telling us about our son and her being the first person ever to see him like I did. She said he was extremely bright but that he had a central processing disorder. Which falls under the umbrella of ADHD. When he receives a lot of information at once he has trouble sifting out what is important and what isn't.
It has been three years since we sat in that office and listened to the Doctor tell us what I already knew about my son. It was worth every penny of the three thousand dollars it cost. My son still has a hard time in school. He still has trouble sitting still, not shouting out answers, keeping quiet and yet he still manages to get mostly A's. Teachers still don't understand him but they have learned to tolerate his short comings. They work with him now instead of against him. He still has bad days but they don't turn into bad years anymore.
What I have learned from my beautiful son. It's hard not to want your kids to be perfect. It's hard not to take it personally when they aren't perfect. ADHD is real! People are judgemental but it's not my business what people think of me or my son. Thanks for patience, go a long way with those who come in contact with my son on a daily basis. I don't have to feel bad that others don't understand my son. He came to me this way and I love him just as he is, which helps me love other peoples children just the way they are. Each day I learn new things from my son, He has helped me be a better more well rounded mom.
From the very beginning he had a lot to say, he made noises constantly. When we put him down on the changing table, he would talk to the air above him as if angels were swirling around him. One night when he was 6 months old I woke up to him crying. When I went to get him from the crib he took my face with both hands and started to jibber jabber as if to say, "I've been crying where have you been?" He would go on to be an early talker, once he started he didn't stop. It was nice to have someone to talk to all day and we talked about everything. I thought he was the smartest baby. I couldn't wait to send him to school.
His toddler years went by pretty uneventfully. Except he had an insatiable desire to do whatever I told him not to. For example...... put his hand on the hot stove, stick things in the electric sockets and touch a cactus. I couldn't take my eyes off him for a second. The only thing that was unusual was when he fell asleep in the car at night if he woke up when we got him home he would be somewhere half way between sleep and awake. When this happened he would just start crying and wouldn't stop. It was terrible because we couldn't put him to sleep or wake him up. We would have to walk around holding and rocking him until he would calm down.
When he was four we signed him up for preschool. He loved going to school each day. His teacher said he was a little silly but that it was manageable. In October he had his birthday. A boy from his class couldn't come. When we would see him each time my son would ask him why he didn't come. The boy was quiet and shy so he never responded. Though I explained it to my son over and over that they were busy that day. He just couldn't understand it. So each time we would see the boy he would ask again. Finally we had to forbid him to ask. The rest of the year went by uneventfully.
At the end of summer we prepared him for kindergarten. About two weeks before school started our school got a giant grant and used it to switch to full day kindergarten. The teachers were taken by surprise and only had two weeks to prepare for the change. They went from having two classes of 18 for 2 1/2 hours each to one class of 22 for 6 hours. It was a big adjustment for everyone. On the first day I got a note. He ran back to the gym equipment after recesses was over. The second day I got a note He was having trouble sitting still all day and he keeps asking for a drink of water. At home we would talk about the notes. Why did you get out of line at recess? "Well the other kids were all on this swing and I really just wanted to try it! It was empty so I ran over to it!" Why are you asking for water all the time? "Well they have a water bubbler in class and the teacher says we can only get a drink when she says we can. If the water bubbler is right there why do we have to ask to get a drink?" These notes came home every other day. My favorite was when He told the gym teacher that someone had already had a turn and the gym teacher responded that he didn't remember, My child responded,"That's okay, you're old, sometimes old people forget things!"
Every week it seem to be something new that the teacher was unhappy about. I was beginning to have a complex. My son spent more time in time out, then out and I was pleading with him each day to just behave and be quiet. The guidance counselor at the beginning of the year said that school could be a hard transition for some and that she was there for the parents also. I decided I would make an appointment. We met a few days later, I brought with me the stack of notes from the teacher. I had at least 30 and it was only December. We talked about all of my concerns and the counsellor decided she would go observe my sons class. In her observation she noted he was a little silly and that he found things a bit funnier then the rest of the class. He also had trouble not shouting out answers. She said it was normal behavior for his age and she would help the teacher with strategies in class. That week I realized my son had picked up reading. In all the hoopla that had surrounded the notes I hadn't noticed he was able to sound out most of the words in our Dr. Seuss books. I brought it up in our conference, Is it normal for children to go from hardly knowing the alphabet to sounding out words in three months? When they realized how quickly he was learning they teamed him with another bright student and the notes decreased substantially.
That summer we moved. First grade was a complete repeat of kindergarten. My son spent more recesses in then out. He had a desk separated from all of the other children and his teacher called every other day. So much so that I began to dread the telephone ringing. If the phone rang today at noon I would still be nervous. I can't speak that teachers name even now. I thought of homeschooling of switching his class. No one else seemed to see what I was seeing. He was bored, he couldn't stop talking and that he would do anything to stop if he could. His report card was all advanced accept for the social skills portion which he failed. The teacher thought he was just misbehaving. His behavior was hard to understand as my husband and I never got in trouble in school. We didn't know what to do. We spent all of our time and energy trying to make him like the other kids. It was like telling a kid who needs glasses that if he tries harder he will be able to see. We made it to the end of the year but our whole family was traumatized.
Second grade was better. The teacher was young and she had better skills to deal with the challenge my son posed to the classroom. He continued to be ahead in all his studies. In conference the teacher would say He can't sit still and he doesn't listen yet he gets A's on every test. We had a reward system going and pretty much we were paying him to sit still. Sometimes it worked and sometimes it didn't. This is when I started looking into the causes of my sons behavior. Something wasn't right and no one would listen to me. He was acing all his subjects except the social skills. Talking out, sitting in his seat, staying on task and always speaking when he shouldn't. It was effecting the way he made friends and his self esteem. He was yelled at constantly and the kids were catching on. Sometimes they would say He had done something when he wasn't even there. When I said ADHD, everyone said NO! including my husband. Summer finally came and we all relaxed.
We entered third grade with new hope as he was older and more mature. Yet by October the teacher was sending notes again. She expected more from a third grader. At this point I couldn't take it anymore, I had a second grader, a kindergartner and and a two year old at home. He was different then all of them. When I looked in his eyes I could see his mind racing. He wanted so badly to fit in but he had no control. It took four months to convince my husband to get him tested. On a sunny day that spring we met with a nuerophycologist in Boston. She did one round of testing and then a week later she did a second round of tests. She thought that he was bright and very interesting. About a month later my husband and I returned to get the results. I remember sitting in the office listening to the Dr. telling us about our son and her being the first person ever to see him like I did. She said he was extremely bright but that he had a central processing disorder. Which falls under the umbrella of ADHD. When he receives a lot of information at once he has trouble sifting out what is important and what isn't.
It has been three years since we sat in that office and listened to the Doctor tell us what I already knew about my son. It was worth every penny of the three thousand dollars it cost. My son still has a hard time in school. He still has trouble sitting still, not shouting out answers, keeping quiet and yet he still manages to get mostly A's. Teachers still don't understand him but they have learned to tolerate his short comings. They work with him now instead of against him. He still has bad days but they don't turn into bad years anymore.
What I have learned from my beautiful son. It's hard not to want your kids to be perfect. It's hard not to take it personally when they aren't perfect. ADHD is real! People are judgemental but it's not my business what people think of me or my son. Thanks for patience, go a long way with those who come in contact with my son on a daily basis. I don't have to feel bad that others don't understand my son. He came to me this way and I love him just as he is, which helps me love other peoples children just the way they are. Each day I learn new things from my son, He has helped me be a better more well rounded mom.
Friday, April 9, 2010
40 Things to do before I turn 40!
Have you seen the bucket list?
A couple of old men with a list of things to do before they die!
Well I certainly do not plan on dying when I turn 40, but this age seems to be older then I have ever felt before and I want to celebrate it rather then fret over it!
I've decided to have a 40 list to help me through the year and hopefully when I turn 40, I won't have any regrets about my last 40 years on Earth. I also hope to have a greater appreciation for where I've come from and who I've become!
So YAY for 40 I can't wait!
1. Go away with my husband for a weekend alone!
2. Read the book of Mormon and highlight any verse that refers to love!3. lose 40 lbs!
4. Read 40 books!
5. Rent all the seasons of Thirty Something! and watch them.
6. Decide what I am going to be when I grow up!
7. Discover a new talent.
8. Give 40 random acts of service.
9. Stop thinking 40 is old! : )
10. Think of 40 new reasons to love my children and tell them!
11. Write down the 40 most influential people in my life and why.
12. Eat at a famous chef's restaurant.
13. Go see a Broadway show.
14. Take a trip to New York.
15. Visit the MET
16. Go on a road trip with the family.
17. Finish painting the house.
18. Find out who my mothers grandparents are for family history.
19. Forgive all of my grudges.
20. Call my Dad more often.
21. Love my husband even more!
22. Learn to make tortillas.
23. Go somewhere I've never been.
24. Get a manicure.
25. Get a pedicure, not sure if I could though! Eww feet!
26. Run/walk a 5K for charity!
27. Have a girls weekend with Megan and AlliKate!
28. Do something special with my Mom.
29. Hike to the top of a mountain.
30. Write about the 30 reason's I liked being 30!
31. Do some missionary work!
32. Improve my food storage.
33. Send 40 love letters.
34. Send 40 thank you notes.
35. Take my kids to Disney World.
36. Visit a church history site I haven't been to.
37. Take a college course that interests me.
38. Try 40 new recipes.
39.Think of 30 reason's to embrace 40!
40. April 8Th 2011, Have a party to celebrate my last day being in the 30's !
* This list may be changed if nessecary, If you have any ideas let me know.
Thursday, April 1, 2010
School Projects!
Have you met this Boy? The one who is ignoring me! Wrentham public schools likes to give this boy an insane amount of School projects!
Have I mentioned I don't like school projects?
Especially large complex school projects with several deadlines.
Every time Chris gets a project I tell him I will not be helping you with this on the last day!
Yet each time I find myself yelling and typing late into the night!
Well about a month ago He was assigned to do a country report on Sweden.
Everyday I reminded him to work on HIS report!And this is what I got him avoiding me!
It's almost all done he would say!
I am working on it at school!
We have two more weeks!
Guess who's project was due today?
Guess who was at the computer sitting with Chris till 11PM last night while he typed 10 pages worth of information about Sweden?
RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!
Have I mentioned I don't like school projects?Especially large complex school projects with several deadlines.
Every time Chris gets a project I tell him I will not be helping you with this on the last day!
Yet each time I find myself yelling and typing late into the night!
Well about a month ago He was assigned to do a country report on Sweden.
Everyday I reminded him to work on HIS report!And this is what I got him avoiding me!
It's almost all done he would say!
I am working on it at school!
We have two more weeks!
Guess who's project was due today?
Guess who was at the computer sitting with Chris till 11PM last night while he typed 10 pages worth of information about Sweden?Guess who knows more about Sweden now? Me or Chris?
If you guessed me you're...........
RIGHT!!!!!!!!!!I hate school projects!
Like I tell Chris I already did 6th Grade!
Tuesday, March 9, 2010
Joe is 6!
Here is my cutie Joe on his sixth birthday!
☺☻☺☻☺
This year has gone by quickly!
I can't believe how tall Joe has grown and how mature he's become!
He love's school and has made lots of new friends.
☻☺☻☺☻
☻☺☻☺☻
Kent got to go to his Kindergarten class and read a book to all the kids!Joe choose Splat the Cat!
Everyone laughed when Kent said,
Mouse!
Which is just what Joe was hoping for! ☺
Which is just what Joe was hoping for! ☺
Here is Joe making a wish for his birthday! Can you guess what he wished for?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
?
If you guessed a puppy you're right!
If you guessed a puppy you're right!
Here she is Lucky Girl!We love her and we love Joe too!
Pretty in Pink ♥
This year was my husbands fourth and final father daughter dance!
Allison wanted to be Pretty in Pink!
I was able to find this adorable dress and she was in pure pink heaven! We even rubbed pink body glitter on her arms and legs!
Kent was the perfect date!
He arrived on time, he was a perfect gentleman and he didn't complain all night when she wouldn't let go of his arm.
(can you blame her?)
I can't believe my girls are so grown up!
Soon these pictures will be just a memory!
My girls will be dressed in white on their wedding days and Kent will be the one who doesn't want to let go!
To little girls daddies are fantastic!
To little girls daddies are fantastic!
They are strong ,kind, safe and always fun!
I love the idea of a father daughter dance as the first date of many my girls will go on!
I hope when they are older they will look for the qualities I've found in their dad and they will be as happy as AlliKate looks in this picture with Kent!
Tuesday, February 2, 2010
Cookbooks!
It is February 2nd and I am well into the doldrums of winter cooking. All the holidays are past and I am dreaming of the grill , salads and the beautiful yummy vegetables that came from my garden last summer.
I know in just six short months it will be hot and sticky outside and the grill will have lost it's appeal and I will be dreaming of a cold night and a yummy stew with a fresh baked crusty bread.
As a cook I am fickle always desiring the tastes just out of reach.
When I find myself in these doldrums I reach for my trusty cookbooks to guild me to a place where my taste buds can settle and sit a spell.
American Classics is the most warn of all my books. The Editors of Cook's Illustrated magazine got together and tested some of the most beloved American recipes, every way imaginable and then collected those recipes into this amazing cookbook, everything from biscuits, to turkey and lemon meringue pie. I love this cookbook! It is filled with so much good information and advice. I think everyone should have one in their cooking library.
♥♥♥♥♥
My next favorite cookbook is
The Bread Baker's Apprentice. Peter Reinhart is a Master of Bread Baking and I would love to be an apprentice in his kitchen. I think this book is as close as I will ever come, but if you love baking your own bread and dream of creating the artisan breads you see in the finest of bakeries this cookbook is for you! I can smell the yeasted dough rising just thinking about this book!
♥♥♥♥♥
For just everyday recipes I turn to
The Joy of Cooking. This is a must have for anyone who spends time slaving in front of a stove. You can find any and all recipes in this book.
♥♥♥♥♥
Finally as a New Englander I recommend all of the cookbooks written by Susan Branch She is a artist, cook, host and gardener from Martha's Vineyard who has the most enjoyable 
cookbooks I have ever seen. This one Heart of the Home notes from a Vineyard Kitchen is one of my favorites. They are filled with yummy recipes, great advice and beautiful hand drawn pictures. If you have never seen one of these books I suggest you check one out next time you are at the book store. You won't be disappointed.
When I have exhausted my cookbook library and I need a good idea, I turn to allrecipes.com. Here I can find some wonderful recipes as well as advice from those who have tried them out.Last but not least if I can't find anything there we turn to take out.
Do you suffer from the winter doldrums in the kitchen?
What do you do? Do you have a favorite cookbook you turn to? If so leave a comment bellow.
Wednesday, January 20, 2010
My 5 sense!
I stole this cute picture from my friends blog!
My friend Angela who writes an Amazing Blog, you can find here http://meetthethomsons.blogspot.com/ , has challenged her readers to give five sense, things you've learned to keep your sanity in homemaking and motherhood, in hopes to win a blog header created by her.
I am not really looking for a header, although she is pretty talented!
I am however always looking for things to blog about and lately my well has been dry!
So here are my five sense worth:
1. Spirituality- Pray with your family in the morning , at dinner and before bed. It is hard to be mad at each other, hold a grudge, not think about each others hardships or not feel the spirit when you are praying together three times a day!
2. Cook for yourself- Cook things you like to eat not just what your kids and husband like. Your kids and husband will come around if you keep putting it on the table. For example I love Brussels sprouts. I am not going to stop eating them because Megan is the only other person, in my house, who likes them.
3. Let your husband help- with the laundry and kids even if he is bad at it! Husbands can't get better at laundry or kid tending if they never do it! I love it when people ask if my husband is babysitting. Husbands don't babysit they care for their children, it's their job too. ; )
4. Decorate your home with the things you love- don't worry about what others think. You live in your home it is your sanctuary. It should be a place you love to be. A place that invites the spirit, makes you feel safe and brings you peace from the outside world.
5. Learn new skills- like baking bread, sewing a quilt, try new recipes, paint a wall or all four! We can't find the things we are great at unless we are first willing to try them. My husband and I gutted and completely renovated our bathroom. We learned to make take out pizza at home. We have scraped, painted and refinished more surfaces then I care to mention. We can vegetables and fruits. We built a cupola for my husbands parents and this past Christmas we made more then half of our gifts. All these skills save us money, give us a sense of accomplishment and help us bond in ways we didn't expect.
Thursday, January 7, 2010
My love Story!
Believe it or not, we weren't always this crazy in Love!
Once upon a time we were just friends!
It took us years to get this CRAZY!
I was just a girl he met once, when he had to give me a ride to a church activity with his friend Jeremy Vick. In fact I had a boyfriend and had only recently joined his church. I had never met him before, but was asked by a Stake councilman to attend an activity with him. Jeremy and Kent were old friends and spent most of the long ride to Brewster talking about their great adventures and how cool they were. I wasn't impressed. It turns out when we got to the activity plans had changed and we were now going to read from Jesus the Christ and have beef stew. The beef stew had peas (Kent's nemesis) so gallantly he leaned over and with his most chivalrous smile, he whispered, "you don't have to eat the stew, peas are gross". Then he said, "at least they have brownies". In that brief moment he became sweet and kind. I knew I could trust him. He had tried to save me from the peas and I appreciated the gesture. I wouldn't tell him peas were my favorite vegetable until years later. When the activity was over we returned to Jeremy's car and proceeded to drive home. Jeremy wanted to drop me off at the church but I had no way home from there. I remember thinking I would have to walk miles to get to my house. I didn't know Jeremy and so I was afraid to push for a ride to my house. Kent insisted that Jeremy drive me home. That was the second time he saved me that day. When we got to my house my boyfriend was waiting. He was upset I had spent the afternoon with two boys from my church and in jealousy he said, "you'll probably marry one of them someday!" I laughed it off as I thought of how mean Jeremy was and how Kent had saved me. I didn't give either of them much more thought. For Kent I would be cataloged in his memory as the girl with the pretty lips!
It took us years to get this CRAZY!
I was just a girl he met once, when he had to give me a ride to a church activity with his friend Jeremy Vick. In fact I had a boyfriend and had only recently joined his church. I had never met him before, but was asked by a Stake councilman to attend an activity with him. Jeremy and Kent were old friends and spent most of the long ride to Brewster talking about their great adventures and how cool they were. I wasn't impressed. It turns out when we got to the activity plans had changed and we were now going to read from Jesus the Christ and have beef stew. The beef stew had peas (Kent's nemesis) so gallantly he leaned over and with his most chivalrous smile, he whispered, "you don't have to eat the stew, peas are gross". Then he said, "at least they have brownies". In that brief moment he became sweet and kind. I knew I could trust him. He had tried to save me from the peas and I appreciated the gesture. I wouldn't tell him peas were my favorite vegetable until years later. When the activity was over we returned to Jeremy's car and proceeded to drive home. Jeremy wanted to drop me off at the church but I had no way home from there. I remember thinking I would have to walk miles to get to my house. I didn't know Jeremy and so I was afraid to push for a ride to my house. Kent insisted that Jeremy drive me home. That was the second time he saved me that day. When we got to my house my boyfriend was waiting. He was upset I had spent the afternoon with two boys from my church and in jealousy he said, "you'll probably marry one of them someday!" I laughed it off as I thought of how mean Jeremy was and how Kent had saved me. I didn't give either of them much more thought. For Kent I would be cataloged in his memory as the girl with the pretty lips!
We wouldn't meet again for two years! actually just before this picture of me with the pumpkins was taken. A friend of mine dragged me along with her to the singles ward, one Sunday in August. She had just returned home from BYU and I was just about to move to Utah. I was at a crossroads in my faith and My boyfriend and I were at an impasse and I needed to get away and decide what was more important to me. The singles ward was the last place I wanted to go, but to be nice I went with her. During the meeting I noticed Kent. I had immediately recognized him, but had forgotten his name. So later, when I saw him in the hall, I said,"Hey I know you!" He was a little surprised, so I quickly introduced myself and asked if he had gone to Brewster with me one Sunday a few years back. He remembered quickly and we reminisced about the stew and the car ride. He asked if I was planning on coming to the singles ward again and I told him that I was moving to Utah. He said that was too bad, he'd like to talk some more! I said maybe in a couple more years! We left it at that. 
Six months later I returned home I had broken up with my boyfriend received a testimony of Temple marriage and got my patriarchal blessing. I was going on a mission. Another girl I had met in Utah(Angie) had moved to my home ward over Christmas break and I was surprised to see her there when I went to church. She had taken a job as a nanny and was desperate to speak with someone her own age. She was as surprised to see me too and we quickly became good friends. She was dying to go to the singles ward and begged me to go with her. We attended the next Sunday. When we first got there I didn't see Kent. He strolled in a few minutes late and sat in the back. He wore this leather coat the whole meeting and he didn't open the Hymn book once to sing a song!
He wasn't my type at all, yet I was so drawn to him. After sacrament meeting I ran into him in the hall. He said, "Hey don't I know you?" So I quickly played dumb! No, with a blank look on my face. "Yeah we went to Brewster together?" He looked confused, so I smiled and assured him that I did remember him. We both laughed and then caught up quickly. He said I'm glad you are back and smiled. He said I should go to the singles ward and by the end of the day he (the ward clerk) and his Dad (the Bishop) were having our records transferred.
He wasn't my type at all, yet I was so drawn to him. After sacrament meeting I ran into him in the hall. He said, "Hey don't I know you?" So I quickly played dumb! No, with a blank look on my face. "Yeah we went to Brewster together?" He looked confused, so I smiled and assured him that I did remember him. We both laughed and then caught up quickly. He said I'm glad you are back and smiled. He said I should go to the singles ward and by the end of the day he (the ward clerk) and his Dad (the Bishop) were having our records transferred.
Angie found him fascinating and quickly wanted to know everything about him. Over the next few weeks we started attending the singles ward regularly. We found out Kent was recently dating a Nanny who had moved back to Utah and that she had broken his heart.
You may think this is where we fall crazy in love but you would be wrong.
No, instead I dated this boy who was leaving on a mission and one Sunday another girl in the ward told me how much he really liked me and how it would just break his heart if I broke up with him. Yikes!!!! I was stuck in that relationship till he left on his mission a few months later. When he left He asked me to wait for him! : ) I gave him a pen and said write me. I never wrote back. During that time Kent called me out of the blue just to chat. He began calling me a lot and soon he would say, "Can't a boy and girl just be friends?" Before you knew it we were friends. The best of friends! Then the rumors started! Are they dating! She likes him! He likes her! The pressure was immense and I was still not ready for that kind of relationship. I was preparing to go on a mission. Kent didn't want to go on a mission. He didn't have his Patriarchal blessing. He didn't even sing songs in Sacrament meeting. He was not my type! Yet I couldn't stop thinking about him. One weekend we took a ride to the beach and there looking out at the water talking about our future he leaned in and kissed me! Right in the middle of We're just friends he changed his mind. I however was still going on a mission.
My old boyfriend invited me to a baseball game a few weeks later and while we were at the game. Kent and some other people went to a miniature golf /arcade place and Kent put our names into a machine which said if we were compatible based on our birthdays. It said we would never work out because Kent isn't romantic. It became the running joke that we shouldn't date because he isn't romantic. Well inspired by all of the teasing, Kent began sending anonymous love letters. He refused to say weather it was him or not. After two weeks he admitted it was him. He invited me to go on a date with him, which was the most romantic date ever. He picked me up at my house and drove us to a beautiful beach where two of our friends(Charlie and Tammy) cooked us an amazing dinner. They pretended like it was a restaurant there was a table with linens, china and candles. Tammy was the waitress and acted like she didn't know us. It was so funny. There we were in the middle of the sand looking out on the ocean. It was everything you could imagine a perfect date would be. If I thought there were rumors before, now they were ten fold. Because I was preparing to go on a mission, I thought a relationship at that time would be too much. So, a week or two later I told Kent I needed a break. At first he understood and gave me my space but then he was angry. He felt I had broken up with him even though we weren't dating. He didn't speak to me for a few weeks.
At the end of summer, He called to tell me he was going to get his patriarchal blessing. The day he received it, he called to tell me he was going to go on a mission. I was so happy for him. In the next month he got his papers together and sent them in. He received his call quickly and He was assigned to Mexico Monterrey North. He would leave in February. Over the next few months I began dating a boy I knew from my home ward. Kent and I became friends again and spoke often. He left in February. I was sad when he was gone, but got to work getting ready for my mission. I went to the temple in April and sent in my mission papers in June. I got my mission call to Argentina Neuquen. I was leaving in September. We keep in touch over the two year span of our missions we wrote lots of letters they were sporadic and inconsistent because of the mailing system so it wasn't much of a correspondence. Kent got home in January of the following year and I was coming home in March.
Kent had a plan and as soon as he got home he began writing weekly. Telling me about home and how excited he would be when I got there. As the weeks went by he began making plans for us. He had it in his head that he was going to marry me! My companions predicted we would get married when I got home. So it was no surprise to see him at the airport on that freezing cold day in March when I returned.
I was so happy to see him, I couldn't think in English and needed someone who could understand my Spanish.
You may think this is the part of the story when they finally fall in love. All I have to say is not yet.
We enjoyed sharing our mission stories and adventures. We were closer then ever and everyone knew it! The talk was he wanted to marry me and he would as soon as I got home. Which is a lot of pressure for a newly returned missionary. Kent was different too! He knew what he wanted in life and he wasn't playing this time. With all the pressure to get married quickly, I lied and told him I prayed about him and he wasn't the one for me. Yikes! Please don't judge me I wasn't ready to pray about marriage and my patriarchal blessing encourages me to be careful about my decision in who I marry. He took it okay and moved on. I did too!
I started dating this guy that was new to our Ward and also just returned from a mission. He had just broken off an engagement and was full of all these ideals. It turns out he was the prefect person for me to spend sometime with. We talked a lot and I discovered some things about me and the person I wanted to marry. I don't think I would of learned if I hadn't dated him. Well in this time Kent started dating someone else too! She was cute and young. Well maybe a little too cute and too young and I didn't really like her or the way Kent didn't look at me anymore and guess what?
I WAS JEALOUS! I think that was his plan though!
One Sunday we stayed late at Church talking in the parking lot. We talked about us, our friendship over the years, why I didn't think I could marry him. I confessed to my lie and we were finally on the same page. We decided we would try officially dating! It was fourth of July week, we met up on Monday, then Wednesday we went to the fireworks together and on Friday when I was at his house we went outside and talked under the stars. That night he convinced me to marry him, he promised we would make each other happy and that we would be the best of friends forever. Right there under the stars we prayed and asked God if we should get married. I can still feel the peace in the air. I remember as I drove home that night the stars in the sky and the music on the radio all seem to say I had made the right choice.
Kent's sister was getting married in November, so we had to push off our wedding till January. On a cold day in January Kent picked me up in a rental car and we drove to Washington DC alone. His parents would meet us there the next morning. We got two hotel rooms and retired early. I felt all alone there, even though Kent was right next door. In the morning I got up and got dressed alone and did my hair, put my Sunday clothes on and when I was ready Kent came to pick me up! It had snowed and we were worried Kent's parents wouldn't make it to the temple. They were flying in that morning!
They made it just fine though!
On that cold snowy day we were Sealed for Time and all Eternity in a beautiful ceremony. Kent's parents, my friend Michele and her Mom (who introduced me to the church) and Brother Badstubner were there. It was quiet, solemn and perfect!
This is the only shot we got in front of the temple because it was still snowing!
This picture reminds me of the ones people had in there houses in Argentina! We look so stiff I don't know why we had already been married for two days!
These are my Niece and Nephew at the reception!
We met in 1990,
We met in 1990,
We saw each other again in 1992,
We became friends in 1993,
We left for our Missions in 1994,
We returned in 1996,
We got married in 1997,
After that everything was a piece of cake! : )
Here's to the thirteen years of being married to my best friend and to thirteen more!
I am thankful for the tender mercies of the Lord which brought us together over and over again.
I am thankful for the tender mercies of the Lord which brought us together over and over again.
I would be surprised to find out Kent wasn't made just for me!
I love him!
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